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December 3, 2003
Meg said to write a
Meg said to write a few lines, so I am.
Yesterday sucked. Ass. I started to sob in my morning meeting and had to excuse myself. I haven't really thought Dad would die from the cancer, and it hit me that he could, and that I might be 850 miles away when he did. I had a stabbing pain in my chest, my shoulders ached, and my throat hurt from trying not to cry all day. I'm having to wear a bite guard at night to keep from destroying my teeth in my sleep.
So (again, yesterday) I left early to go to Marie's. She bought me Eddie Izzard for Christmas and gave it to me early to cheer me up, then made me coffee with cocoa in it. We talked about home schooling and looked at her fish and ate Thai food, and then she ran down all the reasons why she thinks I'm fabulous, and why I have to stop being so very hard on myself.
I still don't feel well, but for the first morning in a long time, I didn't wake to terrible thoughts. I ordered a book on urban sprawl, and got an email a short time later telling me it has already been shipped. I picked up an egg and cheese croissant on my walk to work and ate it reading legal depositions, which were quite interesting. Two of my co-workers asked to see me and told me they'd talked and decided that if I get home for Christmas and don't feel ready to leave by the end of the week, they'd drive the thirteen hours to get me. They made sure that I knew they were serious.
My life is far better than I usually recognize. I need to remember that.
Posted by Kristin at December 3, 2003 1:31 PM